What Not To Wear

Okay! You haters (both of you ;) may think this entire blog is about this topic. Some of you have even threatened to do an intervention on me, but I heard Stacy (from the TV show ) refused my application!
Like my Mother always said, “Honey, they’re just jealous!”

Well, if going on “What Not To Wear” means you have dress in a traditional conservative fashion then I’ll challenge Stacy to let me outfit her!! Can any of you see Stacy in a nice black and white ensemble with some camo, carrying a riding crop and wearing a few skull rings? Oh, and cut her hair too!

I added a copy of some outdated rules below. Don’t wear miniskirts after 40?? Imagine! Many of my female friends are a decade past 40. I am 52, and, dahling, I have gorgeous legs (my husband says so). To paraphrase a Christian verse (Mathew 5:15) “Don’t hide your legs under a bushel.”

When we obey rules that hurt us and others, we suffer and the family suffers. One time my Mother bought me a T-shirt that said “Schizophrenia, Alcoholism, and Homosexuality are all ways of just being polite.” (my brother, me, and, well, don’t ask don’t tell is still around)” Like my Mother also always said, “Just try to fit in…don’t make your father angry!” The typical Alcoholic Family Rules!!! Trying to live by these rules

DON’T TALK

DON’T TRUST

DON’T FEEL!!

ALMOST killed me!
 So, if you’re genuinely comfortable with yourself, show it in your fashion. One period of time in my hospital career I decided to dress very conservatively so that I could feel more like a professional. If that were a genuine expression of my soul it would be fine. Instead, when I have to dress that way I say “I am dressing like a Republican!”

Not to say I want to see my surgeon wearing multiple nose studs if I’m about to go under the knife! Frankly, when I have  family therapy and couple therapy sessions with very conservative people, I will tone down the colors and style. I want to engage them and not frighten them! There is room to consider “a time and place for everything” and that is when we are in service to others such as clients and families.

Lastly, I have to be as honest here as I am everywhere else. After 28 years my natural talents and my extensive professional training as an “experiential” therapist in several different arenas have allowed me great leeway. Those of you that know me are aware of my ADHD character defects (find step 6 of the 12 Step program or hone in on page 65) relating to temporal awareness and numbers phobia. I once had a very conservative, HIGH achiever in a position to say so, tell me “If you weren’t so good I’d fire you!”  We're not always in that situation so all I can say is this is not a call to anarchy, but a call to “thine own self be true…”

What They Tell Us Are Rules

You can't wear white after Labor Day.

It's not OK for tall women to wear high heels?

Pigtails and overalls are for little kids.

Don’t wear miniskirts after 40.

Never Wear Black with Blue.

You Can't Wear Gold and Silver Together.

Horizontal Stripes Will Make You Look Heavy.